I had a dreaded epiphany last week. Yes, you heard me right. I used the words “epiphany” and “dreaded” in the same sentence. Now, most people would consider an epiphany to be something positive. But not me. I call my epiphany dreaded because that’s exactly what it was. You see, last Monday, I woke up like every other day, and dragged my tired self into the shower. Once I got out of the tub, I confronted a stark, ugly reality staring back at me from my full-length mirror. There was no denying it anymore. No excusing it. No ignoring it. I have apparently been wearing my “fuzzy food” googles for way too long. It seems my holiday binging (from Thanksgiving to Valentine’s Day) has finally caught up with me and I couldn’t avoid the undeniable, hard truth. I needed to lose weight … a lot of weight. You see! I told you it was dreaded!
The fact that summer’s bathing suit season is only a mere four months away is causing me massive anxiety attacks. The thought of trying to squeeze into anything latex that highlights my problem areas like a flashing neon sign is making me sweat at night (and not of the menopausal kind). It seems that writing all day while sitting on my squishy behind has certainly not helped my cause. In fact, it’s made it worse. So I decided right then and there, while pointing an accusatory finger at my much fuller self in the mirror, that I would get up off of my very comfortable chair (did I mention it has lumbar support?) and do something about my “junk in the trunk.”
I knew the only way to start my quest was to do my research. Any good writer worth her weight in gold (no pun intended) knows that it all starts with research. In trying to find the perfect combo of dieting and exercising, I came across the idea of carb cycling. It immediately grabbed my attention and I was excited at first. Finally, a diet I could stick to! Imagine, eating spaghetti or munching on a loaf of french baguette while peddling miles away on a stationary bike. Now that’s my kind of weight-loss program. Where do I sign up? But after I did a little more digging, I found out what carb cycling is really all about. Poof went my vision of stuffing my face with pastries while running. I knew it was too good to be true. What carb cycling involves is a system of rotating or cycling the carbs you eat over the course of several weeks. Now what is the fun in that, I tell you. But I decided to give it a try, along with a moderate exercise regime. I set a goal to lose weight and I was not going to back down.
Five days in and I can tell you it’s been hard to stay on track! I would be lying if I said I didn’t think about quitting. In fact, I think about it all the time: every second of every minute of every day. I desperately want to pack it all in and fling my diet out the window (along with my gym membership), especially when there are boxes of Girl Scouts cookies calling out my name from the kitchen counter. But I will not be swayed or tempted or cajoled.
Then it hit me. Dieting is a lot like writing. Now before you tell me otherwise. Let me explain. Taking an idea for a story and trying to put it on paper is very difficult. Starting a novel is hard work. It takes a lot of self-discipline like losing weight does. I’ve often found myself staring at a blank computer screen waiting for inspiration to hit me. Like dieting, it’s so easy to be distracted away from doing what you set out to do (I have a love/hate relationship with the internet like I do with my food). But I find once I get going and the words flow out, it’s exhilarating. Exactly like when I step on my scale and see that I’ve lost a few pounds. At that moment, I feel like I can do anything! It’s a natural high and it keeps you from giving up.
So I vow to keep up with my quest to lose weight while bringing to life the idea for my next book. I’m cautiously optimistic that in a few months, I’ll have a smaller waist and a finished novel. If not, it’s back to carbs for me (without the cycling, thank you very much).
Erin