So I have decided to take a short break in my blog from talking about writing romantic comedies and instead focus on relationships. And I guess you can say it is related to romantic comedies because relationships form the foundation and provide the feeder for the comedy and the romance in any book and/or movie, right? So, here goes.
I think I’ve explained in my bio that I have experience in finding love because it took me years to find it myself. That was fifteen years ago and now I am happily married to a wonderful man. In fact, he is the person I think about when I write the male leads in any of my romantic comedies. He’s got the right combo of sexy, cute, confident, stubbornness, passionate, funny all rolled into one (like a Snickers bar that has chocolate, caramel and nuts put together in a smart package. I express everything good in my life in terms of chocolate). But like I just said, we’ve been married for 15 years so you know that ours isn’t always roses and thrills of first kisses and picnic lunches in Central Park.
Since we’ve been married for so long, it’s inevitable that we fight. In fact, it’s absolutely normal (at least that is what I’ve been told by several generations of women in my family).
What do we fight about? We fight about a lot of things-it can be small, big and somewhere in between-we don’t discriminate. We fight about our children, about finances, in-laws, work. We fight because we are tired, exhausted. We fight because we need an outlet for our pent up anger at the driver who cut us off that morning or the boss who yelled at us because he is a prick. We fight because our baseball team lost that weekend or because the hairdryer stopped working midway through a blow out.
The other day, I noticed a pattern in all of our fights. My husband always ends our disagreements with a roll of the eyes and the simple statement: “You always have to be right.” Usually I dismiss this comment with a wave of my hand but while I was driving the other day, I thought about it and instead of getting angry, I actually agree with him.
I mean who actually goes into an argument thinking they’re wrong? Why would you fight if you knew you were going to lose? Like war, you pick your battles and you put your men on the front line and you fight as hard as hell for what you believe in. From Colonel George Washington to General Patton, we fight for our ideals. It is the American way. What would the world be like if we didn’t fight for what we believed in. Would we even be living in the United States of America if the colonists agreed with everything that the English King said or did?
So the fact that both my husband and I believe that I always have to be right when we fight may have been the first time in our many years of marriage that we both can actually agree on something. He may have something to say about that but am I right? Of course, I am:-)